my mother n law?
I worked for a company overseas and was working in Europe for a year and my husband also travelled for his job . We left the keys to our apt with his brother to keep a eye on things While away my mother n law went or had my brother n law give her my address book and went through it she then flew from the usa to europe and turned up at my place of employment ,talked with my boss etc and told my boss I had said it would be ok . I had no knowledge until my boss called me in Germany . I was furious . She said she only went there as she fell over . I wote her a letter she will not apologize and my husband wants me to just get over it .I suspect her intentions were to find out what she could about me ..I have spent most of my life overseas.She also turned up to our wedding we were out of town and decided to get married alone . She stayed in our room and said she could not find a room. It was Las Vegas. She gave me a pair of Mickey Mouse socks with the price1.99 on our wedding day
It is easy to say ignor eher but she is really clever and always up to something ….I woke up from a nap only to find my husband gone she paid him 100.00 to take her to the movies . we had plans for dinner and she knew . This was my husband fault but she should not be enticing him
I guess my question is why would someone want to be like this . She attends church every Sunday and reads her bible
Oh yeah they happened and I can only assume she just loves to play games and hurt people . I have tried to stay away and not complain but my husband keeps pushing as he wants us to be friends . I just would prefer not to attend any functions and let him have his own relationship but he keeps on and I can only assume she is behind it crying to him
9 Responses
EvilWoman0913
27 Feb 2010
Ziggy
27 Feb 2010
The woman obviously has some serious emotional problems. Rather than despise her, I’d pity her. She really needs to get some help; anything you can do along these lines can only help your hubby’s mother, and your relationship with her.
Buzz B
27 Feb 2010
Whats your point???
what is your question??
Sounds like you should just ignore her. and get over it.
you are only making yourself unhappy. She doesnt’ care if you are unhappy because of her actions…
lock your house and have someone thats not family keep the keys.
curious
27 Feb 2010
She is looking for troubles. I guess you will not be good daughter in law to herJust ignore her and try to distance from this family as much as possible.
misslady81
27 Feb 2010
omg, lol. wow. no you shouldn’t just get over it. just because your husband grew up with her acting like this, it doesn’t mean that you have to accept that. i would have a talk with your brother in law or better yet, just find someone else to look after your house while you are away and i would change the locks since it’s possible that she could have a spare key. while the mickey mouse are completely tacky i would just forget about that. her actions shows that she doesn’t like you. don’t worry about her not apologizing to you. you need to figure out a way where you don’t have to experience this situation again. your husband needs to stand behind you and not go with the flow of things. you are justified in the way that you are feeling. she isn’t respecting your privacy so the only way to make things better is to not give her access to your personal life and things.
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i’m back. you need to get it through your husband’s head that you are #1 in his life, not mommy. your husband is completely wrong for cancelling your plans because his mother bribed him with $100. you are more important than that $100. you need to get it through to your husband that this can’t go on. this will continue as long as your husband allows it to. if you guys don’t have kids already imagine how much worse it’s going to be once they arrive. she will be around much more. your husband is just as much of the issue as his mother. some people who get into other’s peoples business are just very nosey. they need to find a way to keep themselves occupied which makes them look extremely bad. she is not going to change, but i’m sure it gets on other people’s nerves. have a serious talk with your husband. he can schedule date nights with his mother, but if he has plans with you he needs to tell her no and not give her any information regarding you and him.
starbrt
27 Feb 2010
Sorry, don’t quite understand your question, but understand your problem. I don’t know how long you have been married, but I see your mother in law as very intrusive in your life. She is definately afraid you are taking her son "away " from her, and things you can give him she never will be able to, you know what I mean. Keep you distance if you can, and don’t complain to your husband about her. Treat her well, from a distance. It has worked wonders for me.
daeve930
27 Feb 2010
Your brother-in-law broke your trust in giving her access to your belongings, and she of course has no business looking at them. If your employer gave her any information on you, he’s is completely in the wrong. Any can say, "she said it’s ok" but it doesn’t matter. I don’t know what this means: "She said she only went there as she fell over." What would she ask your boss? Was she trying to give him information on you? I just don’t understand why she’d do that, pay to fly to Europe, and why your boss would even talk to her.
You have to take this in hand. It’s up to both you and your husbnad to set limits and up to him to enforce the limits. He’s sounding like a wuss to me. Staying in your room is absurd, especially if she wasn’t invited. The socks could have been meant as a joke, but when the ceremony was over — or before if you really didn’t want her there — you should have been taking her back to the airport.
Frankly, it’s hard to believe these things have happened. My mother-in-law looks a lot better right now. The worst she ever did was call me fat and lazy.
FaeryWatcher
27 Feb 2010
Reading the bible and going to church, a saint doesn’t make.
Your MIL is doing her "Christian Best" to sabbotage your marriage to her son. No one should EVER contact their kids’ place of employment—for any reason….EVER! Your husband is wrong wrong wrong…did I say wrong? He’s wrong. (;o) ) …Seiously, your husband should tell her this is HIS life and you are HIS wife..and he should have called the front desk and gotten her a suite if necessary. Or you 2 could have left her in your room, and gone to the suite. I had a son do that to me once (stayed and said he couldn’t get another room), and it turned out that he was jealous of me having a boyfriend (my son was 14 ).
Go to a counselor!….your husband needs to hear someone else beside you tell him he needs to put you FIRST!
Rosy Lee
27 Feb 2010
I really do feel for you but its important to remember this woman is his Mother. You have to be careful what you say to him about her. He probably realises what a pain she is but he still needs this relationship with her. Have you thought of having her to visit on your terms? You invite her and arrange it with dates etc so that you know whats happening and are less likely to be manipulated?
Try to be civil and polite for the sake of your husband. You do need barriers with this woman but it takes time to negotiate those. I do truly feel sorry for you, its a horrid situation.
Best of luck.
I think your husband may have the right idea. Ever heard the saying "Keep your friends close, your enemies closer"? I think it might be a good idea to become best friends with this crazy old woman………